Transforming Apologies to Gratitude

“I’m sorry you had to clean up after me,” your tween says after throwing up.

Confused, and a little bewildered, you reply, “it’s not a big deal. That’s what I’m here for.”

Your child has a friend visiting for a sleepover, and in the middle of the night, they decide they don’t want to stay. You load up the car and are on your way to drop them off. From the backseat, you hear, “I’m sorry you have to drive me home.”

You respond reassuringly, “It’s totally fine. That’s what I’m here for.”

After talking to our partner and friends, we may feel confident that we are not sighing exasperatedly or complaining to our children. However, we may become concerned when our kids over-apologize, worrying that they might be taken advantage of. We might explain to them the dangers of overusing “sorry.” But sometimes, what we might be missing is the underlying message they are trying to express—one of gratitude.

The next time your child apologizes unnecessarily, consider exploring if they are actually looking to express gratitude. Together, you can work to transform “I’m sorry for…” into “Thank you for…”

Intentionally,

Ashley

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